DAY 78, 79, 80: Vehicular Porn

Un altro tre-combo di blogo... that was a combo de Italiano e Espanol y Blondo, translating to: another 3-day combo of bloggage... including the Tuesday, Wednesday & Thursday leading up to Easter weekend and Spring Break... Party on Wayne!

78: Totally Tubular Tuesday Brah! Yogi, granola and coffee… whoo hoo for a change up on my cereal mixer. Early morning grain choices can strongly influence the outcome of one’s day, I’m certain there are studies that prove this… while I was away playing with my besties in Roma, Firenze e Cinque Terre, there was a “cross-hatch drawing of a cup” assigned, and since everyone gave an elementary effort (piss poor) the first go ‘round, we were re-assigned upon my return. As fascinating as my “Good Morning” coffee mug is, I chose to rebel and draw a hairy-tusked boar, claiming it an exercise in interpretive art. After a mind-numbing critique of cups! we got some much needed fresh air and walked up to Corciano for another drawing assignment: arches! I held my ground against the wind on a bench parked in front of a window, with an arch of course…

Back down the hill before a storm-tease, I gained a gallery-worthy sketch and a hungry belly…. Drum roll please…. PENNE! Surprise! I opted for seconds on salad. You’re killin’ me Smalls… after lunch we had a hot date with some hot rides- Ferraris that is. Long time friends of the Vasta family own the Ferrari dealership in Ellora (short 10 minute short bus ride). Let me preface/prepare you by explaining how/why on Earth we are at a car dealership… “Conga’” is this quintessential “Motor head”… some prefer Martha Stewart, some liken to Playboy, few fancy Martha Stewart in Playboy, but Mr. Jeffrey Conger is OBSESSED with Hot Rod magazines- that might be an understatement. Besides acting as head of the Graphic Design department at MSU, he is a motorsport photographer and journalist for American Rodder, Rod & Custom, Street Truck and Hot Rod Magazine to name a few (he was selected by I. D. Magazine as one of the top creative individuals in America- A.K.A. a B.F.D.- you can figure that one out, starts with Big, ends with Deal…) in the art world (I feel like I should present him with an award now). So, no more need to explain why he drug our asses to a car dealership. Ferraris and Maseratis and Beema’s, Oh My! Basically it was a motor head’s wet dream… there’s the glossy paper car porn, but when those glass doors slide open up into the glossy rooms cradling tin, plastic and paint, it’s like a stripper taking the stage.

Before we got to the dealership, the group acted similar to 2^nd graders on a field trip to a nuclear energy plant (uber enthused…), but once we rubbed elbows with a garage full of 800,000 Euro paint jobs, the tune went up a few octaves. We had a two-hour drawing assignment after a tour of the joint… the combination of my headache, A.D.D. and taking direction with a spoonful of cement led me wandering around snapping photos instead. What did I learn today you ask? Well, I learned that any car owner caught dead with a dust particle, chipped windshield or grocery cart scrape on their Ferrari, will have it reclaimed by the dealer, until they can afford to or simply buck up and fix it. I also calculated how much 800,000 Euros is in USD and daydreamed about how many OTHER, lower maintenance things I could purchase… All in all, it was a cool experience… we hit up a grocery for those interested on the walk to the bus station and trooped back to the villa for dinner. Spaghetti, potatoes and fish… fish please. If this is your first time reading Blond Voyage, you’ll soon learn that I don’t do pasta… once a month MAYBE, but twice a day? No thanks. Plus my boss told me he was starting Friday Staff Weigh-Ins when I get home, and to “put the fork down”… haha, shout out to Plonk, yeah! 6'2" at a buck twenty? Hello eating disorder...(He’s kidding. I think…)

79: Hump day. Took an early morning run before my muesli, yogi e banana. We were supposed to take another field trip to the Art Academy in Perugia, but because the bus system was on the “Easter Holiday Schedule” (it’s Wednesday mind you. Easter is Sunday… typical Italians), we had no transportation to the Emerald City (so not) which resulted in a studio-of-your-choice morning… I wrote and made “The Harv” an arrivederci card. Sadly, our fearless leader is heading back to Montucky (he probably can’t wait), so tonight was his Going Away Party. We had dinner with a guest violinist who treated us to some post dinner melodies… porksteakpotatoespastapoo, that’s what’s for dinner. *SIDENOTE: Richard Helzer and his wife Kathy arrived today for a month-long vacation… Rich was my advisor, Metalsmithing professor and Director of the Art Department at MSU for… well, he taught my mother- through all of which, he’s become a great mentor and friend, so I’m excited to have them here for awhile. * After the concert and a poetry reading by our lovely cook Paola, we booked it upstairs to the poolroom for some Motown dancin’ and vino drinkin’… Bibi kicked us out at 11 pm, but “The Harv” was ready to rally… we moved to a room in the country house, threw on the jams (music, not pj’s) and boogied down. In between Jackson 5 and The Supremes, Harv told us about seeing the Beatles in ’64 (couldn’t hear anything but shrills from girls) and his dancing days on American Bandstand. After some great fun, bedtime is anyone’s guess- definitely slept like a dead person.

80: Thirsty Thursday was not so… more like Hung-over Thursday, for all. But, we needed pep in our step and a cute Easter outfit for the infamous “Painting of the Egg.” Because Rich just arrived, Harvey was leaving and Spring Break was beginning, we celebrated Easter today with an egg painting contest and a late lunch of lasagna and a lamb stew. After I shed a tear upon “The Harv’s” departure, I took a much needed snooze for a few hours- Motown really takes it outa’ ya! The dogs put in 4.5 miles on the country roads, before they walked me to dinner, which I didn’t eat because I had leftover turkey and Swiss that needed to me eaten before I leave… spent the evening writing and dawdling, an activity I’ve become far too comfortable with lately… Off to Rome tomorrow to begin the Breakage of the Spring- Ciao!